My wonderful friends got me a GPS for my birthday. Not any GPS, but a "GPS for Dummies". To some this may seem an odd gift, but not for me. See, I get lost quite a bit, which is extremely easy in Nashville. It is the only city that I have ever been to where the road name changes as you are traveling down it. Now, I do have my own personal Mapquest, my good friend Paula, but she is not always available. So, I now have my own personal access to all the places I don't know how to get to, any time I want.

I was wondering how life would be if we had our own personal GPS for life. We could key in where we wanted to be in life and it would automatically lead us to where that is. Unfortunately, this is not how life is. Several times this week I have said to people that they just need to trust in God's plan. It is extremely hard to do when some things are so uncertain. I struggle with this all the time. We all do. It is all about faith and having the faith to trust. Knowing that He wants the best for you and even if what is happening at the time doesn't seem like it will benefit you, or will hurt you, if you are in God's will, then it is the best thing for you. I daily remind myself of this. When you are struggling, not matter what it is with, just give it to the Lord and let Him handle it.



I love church on Tuesday nights. I don't always get to go, but when I do, I learn so much and of course, God always aligns it with something that I have kept deep in my heart and only He is aware of.

Tonight was no different. See, I have a friend who is hurting. She was sitting next to me tonight and her tears fell on my hand. I thought to myself - I know exactly what she is going through. I have been there and know the pain she feels. Then it occured to me...so does God. He felt betrayed, unloved and hurt by the people He loved, just like we can when we are hurt.

I realized tonight that I have been such a brat lately. Iused to pray consistantly that God would use me for whatever He wanted. He did, and I was hurt badly in that process. Since then, I haven't been praying that He can use me, when that is what I am here for. I am here to serve Him and have Him use me any way He see's neccessary. It is time for me to open my heart again and no matter what comes my way...no matter how badly I get hurt...I need to know that it is God's will because that is what He planned for me.


End of the Week

My family left early this morning, and it made me really sad. My house is really quiet and I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do with myself today. I had so much fun spending time with them this week. I love them so much and have enjoyed seeing them grow up and being a part of their life, even if it is only a little bit at a time.

I don't know why God brought me to Nashville, or what else He is going to do with me here, but I do know that being in His will is the only way I want it. I miss my family very much, but God is who I need to follow. Until I know what else He has for me, I will keep faithful and see my family as much as time allows.

JEE Day 6

My mom and sister Lori came late Thursday night to spend Friday with us. We had a good day overall. The kids were tired and I think they were ready to go home and get back to their regular schedules. What I realized from this week is that being responsible for kids is a huge job. All week it was up to me to feed them, make sure they brushed their teeth, make sure they were kind to each other, and keep them safe.

I started wondering what they would be like as adults, and tried to remember what I was like as a child. How do we learn who we are and what behavior is appropriate? We learn by experiences. For instance, I don't jump on the furniture. I did when I was little, but I can't remember one time as an adult that I have done that. When the kids were here, I probably told them 100 times not to jump on the furniture. What would it take for them to learn? Getting hurt? Will that make them remember that jumping on furniture is not correct behavior? Or is it just growing up and hearing that they aren't supposed to do that over and over?

I do believe it is a little bit of both. Life experiences are what teach us and make us who we are. I have been hurt a few times in my life. That has taught me and caused me to grow in who I am. Every experience is intended to make us who we are. We may not understand what we are going through at the time, but trusting God through it and waiting to see what He is trying to teach us will make us who God intended us to be.


JEE Day 5

Every morning we get up and have breakfast together. We hold hands and pray, then as they eat, I read a passage that they have picked from the Bible. Sunday, I read about Love from 1 Corinthians. Monday, Evan picked the book of Titus. Tuesday, Joseph picked Genesis and God making Eve out of Adam's rib. Wednesday, Emma picked Jesus walking on the water and Peter walking out to him. Today they each got to pick something, and the first one was about the 10 Leopers Jesus healed, then Moses parting the Red Sea, and then Jonah and the Fish. Each of these were something special to each of them. They were stories that they knew and that we would refer to often as we were talking throughout the day.

That special time each morning was what I wanted them to remember from this week. I want them to know that God should always be a part of their day and they should read their Bible and pray everyday. It is something that we all can remember and apply to our lives. Without God everyday our life will not be as fulfilled, and we will not get to know Him as intimate as we should. If God is to be our best friend, then spending time with Him everyday is the only way to achieve that.

JEE Day 4

They broke me today. I am woman enough to admit that today I caved. See, the PS2 controller was a little broken ( they could still use it, but the thingy that rolls around was kind of out of the socket) so to me they could still use it, but to an 8 and 10 year old, this is not a good controller. So, today I bought them not one, but two, wireless controllers. All week I told them that they didn't need it, that we could do other things, but I finally gave in. I wondered why I gave in, and it is only because I love them. They are good kids and what is a little sacrifice to grant them some joy and happiness in playing games that they enjoy...and me some time to clean the house and do laundry? I don't see any harm in that.

My nephew Evan likes to plan. He is 8. He will one day marry a woman who will completely appreciate this in him. He gets that from his mom giving him play by plays of what they are going to do each day. So this week, he constantly asks me what we are doing and will try to plan our day. It cracks me up. So, I have been teaching all of them that we are just going to "go with the flow" this week. We can do whatever and go wherever, whenever we want. So tomorrow we are going to the zoo, and they don't know it. We will get up and eat breakfast, then off we go. It will drive them nuts not knowing, but it will be good for them.

How often do we try to plan our lives out? I know I do. My plan was not to still be single, but it was God's. I find that when we try to plan, it usually does not come out the way we planned it. God's plans are perfect and as long as we are faithful to Him and continue to follow Him, our life will go according to what He wants, and will be the most fulfilling life we can ever have.

JEE Day 3

Well, today was a busy day! We went swimming of course and Evan learned how to float. I explained how and he tried it with my help, but he kept sinking. I thought at first that he may be like my dad, and not able to float (yes, my dad can't float - he sinks.) but after he practiced, he got it. He just had to try it himself first. Now he wants to float all the time because he knows he can do it.

After dinner, we went over to Mark's so the boys could play XBox. To me this was not a major thing, but apparently when you have a PS2 and get to play an XBox, it is a big deal. Emma was in the kitchen with Brittany and me while the boys were playing. Oh, and by the way, kids hear and repeat everything just in case some needed to know that...anyway, I was telling Brittany that earlier that day Emma would not dance with me. See, the Jonas Brothers came on T.V (apparently they are a big deal in a kids world) and were singing, so I got up and was dancing all around the living room. Emma wanted no part of it. When Brittany asked her why she wouldn't dance with me her response was " I am not a dancer...I'm going to be a Doctor". Good to know that she isn't going to be a dancer...her parents will be relieved.

Joseph just goes with the flow. He is so sweet but also has his moments. We were in the car, and of course I am joking around with them, and he gives me "the look". You know, the look kids give you when you think you are funny and they think you are a dork. Yes, that is the look I got. I have officially traveled out of the world of being cool, and into the world of being a dork. Not sure when that happens, but it did.

Overall it was a good day. They are very tired though, so bed time is early for this week. I will have to say that I am tired too, but love every minute of it.


JEE Day 2

Today was another action filled day with the kids! I got up and made breakfast, then off to the pool we went. It was nice because it was just the 4 of us and that was a lot of fun. They get bored after a couple hours, so I have to plan our day accordingly.

Today was also Evan's 8th birthday. So, of course we went to Chuck E Cheese and played for a few hours. That was after we painted pottery. So today I really think that I got to feel like what it is to be a single mom. I am not a single mom, but today I learned to appreciate them in a whole new way. I honestly can't imagine what it is like, but I know that they have the hardest job in the world. Just to get ready to go today was an event!

As I was getting ready to put my make up on, Emma came in to the bathroom. She was telling me that she was glad I was putting make up on because I don't look very good without it. I couldn't fault her for being honest and she was telling the truth because I don't! Kids are so honest about things and I wondered what it would be like if we all were that honest? What if we said everything that was on our mind? Like I say all the time - it is all in the delivery. How you say things to someone can make all the difference in the world. I am trying to teach my neice and nephews that this week because they say things to each other that they shouldn't and hurt each others feelings. We do need to be honest, but we also need to be more aware of other people and how they perceive us.


JEE Day 1

Well, day one is completed. My niece and nephews are here for a week with Aunt Lisa, and boy am I tired! It is very worth it though. They are full of life and energy, and they crack me up! Of course, being cousins they do have their moments, but overall they are a complete joy!

The best conversations are in the car and at the table during meals. Yesterday in the car Emma told me that that I must be sad because I was single. She told me that I must get lonely because I don't have a man to take care of me...Well...Huh...how do I anser that? How do I explain to someone that thinks she is a princess like Cinderella, that it's OK to not be married until God is ready for me to be. That's not how it happens in the movies, right? At the end of every love story is "happily ever after...". Then my nephew, Evan asked me if I cried when I was lonely. I told him that yes, sometimes I did cry because I missed them and the rest of the family. So, their answer to that was for me to move back to Hillsboro and then they could see me everyday. Then I wouldn't be lonely and Grandpa would be there to help me. They are so cute when they are young, aren't they?

So that got me thinking about how many people are out there that are lonely. I know that there are several. Yes, there are times that I am lonely but I have to get up, stay faithful and wait for the knight in shining armor that God has for me.



I know it has been a long time since I have written anything. It has been a crazy busy summer! God, as always, is amazing. I can't describe all the amazing things that He has done in my life the last couple months, because there has been a lot.

What I will say is stay faithful. Keep dialy communication with God because that is the only way to keep your complete focus on him. Everyone is busy. I am extremely busy with work and life. It is easy to say you will do it later but will you? God desires you every day and wants you to be in His presence continually.

God answered a very important prayer today for someone very close to me. The situation my friend was in was very scary, but God took care of it. As this has been happening the last few weeks, it has really made me think about what is important, and it put a lot of things in perspective. Life is busy, but it is also too short to not live your life close to God.



No, I didn't win $10,000...but I did run (and walk) my first 10K last weekend. For those of you who know me well, you know that I detest running. It all started in January when my good friend Lisa suggested that all of us girls run in the Flying Pig 10K in Cincinnati. We all agreed and the training started. Well, if you could call it training. The most I have ever ran was around the bases in softball. So, this was a challenge for me. I started slow, walking most of the time and running a little bit. Over time the running increased, and so did my shin splints. Apparently, that is something else that I get from my father. In February I did 6 miles in 1.5 hours and I knew I had to train harder if I was going to get through this! A few weeks before the race, I did get out more and just hoped for the best.

My goal of the weekend was to complete the 6.2 miles, in less than 1.5 hours. That is all I wanted. When we were waiting for the race to begin, it was pooring rain. Not just a drizzle, a heavy rain that the wind was blowing sideways. I prayed the whole time that God would hold it off just long enough to complete the race. I was nervous enough and didn't want the rain on top of it! As soon as we started the rain subsided and didn't rain again until we were leaving for the car! Yes, that is God. The coolest thing about the race were the people. Several times I almost got very emotional because there were people out there cheering us on. It was cold and wet, but they were out there encouraging people they didn't even know. That is what kept me going. In mile 3, two of my friends were waiting there and that really kept me going. My shins were so sore, but my friend said "you can do this - keep going!". Just what I needed to hear at that point in time (thanks Jody).

This got me thinking. In life there are times when we could give up. Times when we don't want to go on and complete the race. That is when we need our friends and family there encouraging us on. Giving us words to lift our spirits, and that are there congratulating us when we complete the race. We also need to be that friend to others. We need to be the encourager at times and lift others up. Don't get so lost in your own life that you forget about those around you. Even people you don't know. God could use you to encourage someone and you don't even know it. I have no doubt that God put these people in my life for a reason and used them for me to complete the race. I did complete it in 1:23 and God was with me the entire way. It was an amazing feeling crossing the finish line and knowing I completed the race and met my goals, with amazing friends there along the way.


I Am

Isaiah 41:10- So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Bread, Water, Way, Truth, Life, Beginning, End, Love...these are just a few ways to describe God. This week God has been showing me who He is. I have Bible Verse cards that I flip over each week that I can see daily. Isaiah 41:10 was the verse from this week. I have had a lot on my mind this week with a lot of decisions to make. I have been praying for clarity and wisdom of God's will, and expecting an answer. Well, all week God has been showing me who He is. Tuesday night at church, the pastor was speaking out of John and John 1:1 begins with how the Word is God. So, he proceeded to go through knowing who God is. I thought, Ok??? I was expecting an answer to my prayers, not a lesson on who God is. I know who God is...So, I sort of dismissed the lesson but I kept praying, and expecting an answer for what I was praying for.

Then, my week went on and it was a tough one. All week the theme was the same. Knowing who God is and being patient. On several instances, God was telling me the same thing. Then Isaiah 41:10 was spoken into my life several times. My bible verse cards, the worship leader read it during worship, then it was read on the radio when I got in the car. I literally said out loud, "what God...what are you trying to show me with this...I don't want to miss what you have for me, please, please show me". Then I went to the church I used to go to. I was supposed to go last week, but couldn't because I had to go to Ohio suddenly. Well, today I went and it was amazing. I got to see exactly who my God was. God is bigger than anything. It is all about Him and is all for Him. He is the one in control and showed me that His will is perfect and He is perfect. That is who God is. He is perfection and there is nothing that goes on in my life that He is not in control of. He is the Word and His Word says that He is my God. He was with me today, as he is everyday being my strength and holding me up in His hand.



Joshua 6:2-5 - 2.Then the LORD said to Joshua, "See, I have delivered Jericho into your hands, along with its king and its fighting men. 3. March around the city once with all the armed men. Do this for six days. 4. Have seven priests carry trumpets of rams' horns in front of the ark. On the seventh day, march around the city seven times, with the priests blowing the trumpets. 5. When you hear them sound a long blast on the trumpets, have the whole army give a loud shout; then the wall of the city will collapse and the army will go up, everyone straight in."

In my quiet time recently, I was lead to the story of Joshua and the city of Jericho. I have read and heard this story many times, but this particular time it was used to help me see where I have been for quite a while.

As I was reading this the other day it made me think of a long time friend of mine who always told me that I built "walls" up around my heart. He could see that when I was hurt, my defense was to put that wall right up to protect myself from being hurt again. I always thought he was crazy saying that, until I was in church a couple of Sundays ago (of course, it was the Sunday after Joshua was my quiet time). I was sitting in church and during worship I realized that for the last year I have had a wall built around my heart. The wall was not towards people, but it was towards God. I know that seems odd to say, but my prayer for the last year has been for God to use me, but to protect me from being hurt again. What I was doing was putting a stipulation on God to say "okay God, here I am. You can use me, but only if I don't get hurt. If I will get hurt, then I'm out". My wall was causing a rift in my relationship to God. Yes, I was reading my Bible daily and praying, but I wasn't listening. I couldn't hear God and I couldn't figure out why until I realized that I had a wall around my heart just like Jericho.

This was a big "AhHa" moment for me. I have to work on surrendering everything everday to Him and not to allow the wall to go back up. If there is a wall that you are holding up, let it go. Surrender it all to God and He will be your refuge.


Taking time

In your life do you ever find yourself doing something without thinking about it? Every morning I get up at usually the same time, depending on how many times I hit the snooze button. Then I go through my routine. Shower, quiet time, makeup, hair, dressed and out the door for work. The other day, I got it in my head that I was going to get up early and go to the gym because I wasn't going to be able to go to after work. I got up at 4:30...yes, I said it, 4:30 a.m. My routine was not normal that day. I actaully think that my body went into shock because I got up that early and on top of that I worked out for an hour!

It made me think that many times we just go through the motions of life. Often I just go through the motions of my day, doing what needs to be done. I get so busy that I don't stop and take time to really spend quality time with others. I am pulled in so many directions that I dont' take the time for what is important. God commanded us to love. Love others as He loves us. Would God ever get so busy that he didn't take the time to listen? That He wouldn't take the time to stop what he is doing to show His love? My life lately has been consumed with work and I have not been taking time to stop and show God's love to others. What is the point to life if we are not doing God's work? I hope when you read this you will stop focusing so much on what isn't getting done and focus more on those that are around you. Work will always be there tomorrow...people may not be.


Praise Him

1 Peter 4:16 - However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name.

There is a song by Casting Crowns called Praise You In This Storm. It is a very popular song with a powerful meaning. It a hard to do, but when you stop focusing on your problem, and put the focus on God, you will see it, and be able to bear it, in a whole new way.

When I was home for Christmas we had a death in the family. Jim was my mothers cousin(Connie) husband. He was 59 years old and lost his battle with cancer on Christmas day. I did not know the family very well, because I have been away for so long, but what I remember of Jim, he was always smiling and laughing. He adored his wife and loved the Lord. What made me think of this song and verse was my mom telling me something Connie did the Sunday night before Christmas. My mom was at their house and their entire family was there. They knew it was any time that Jim would be going home to see the Lord and mom said that Connie cried out to the Lord to comfort and shelter her. In the face of her husbands death, she cried out to the Lord.

Whenever we face something that we think we will never get through, praise God. Praise Him for everything, no matter what it is. When you are going through something that is tough, if you see God's hand in it, you will learn more about yourself. Trials will make you stronger and will help you learn more about yourself. Praise God for the trial and for what He is going to teach you through it. It will be hard, and you may feel like you won't make it through, but God will comfort you and guide you.